Definition of the Day for the 4th of July — Free

Posted: July 4, 2015 in Humor, Livin' in the USA
Tags: , , , ,

FREE, adj. In advertising, anything bearing a hidden cost, as in “two free dinners with purchase of . . . “; 2) A descriptive term often used by subjects of repressive governments to describe themselves and their nations, as in the oft-heard oxymoronic assertion, “this is a free country”; 3) n., A self-identifying label commonly used by these same individuals, as in “the land of the free,” or, more simply, “the free.” When used in this manner, an acceptable synonym is “gang of slaves.”

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–from the revised and expanded edition of The American Heretic’s Dictionary, the best modern successor to Ambrose Bierce’s Devil’s Dictionary


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