First, a bonus definition — which has become freshly relevant in recent weeks — from our 2016 release, The American Heretic’s Dictionary (revised & expanded):
REPUBLICAN, adj. Having an affinity for gold, in both bullion and shower form.
Now for the advertised definitions. The first one is from the Heretic’s Dictionary; the second will appear in an even further expanded edition, should be we ever get around to publishing one.
REPUBLICAN PARTY, n. 1) Once described as “America’s largest hate group,” the Republican Party is often scurrilously portrayed as consisting entirely of racists, but this is not so. Many Republican leaders are not racists themselves, but are merely content to pander to them; 2) A political party that appeals to the absolute worst in people, and delivers. The Republicans (or, as they humbly put it, “God’s people”) appeal to fear, misogyny, homophobia, xenophobia, arrogance, authoritarianism, a preening nationalism, a persecution complex, pride in ignorance, and just plain meanness. This is in stark contrast to the Democratic Party, which appeals to the best in people, their hopes and aspirations — and then systematically betrays those hopes and aspirations.
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–from the revised and expanded edition of The American Heretic’s Dictionary, the best modern successor to Ambrose Bierce’s Devil’s Dictionary